If you truly enjoy those you work with, you’re in good company. Most people say they are highly satisfied with their relationship with their boss and co-workers, according to Pew Research. Sometimes, though, a colleague might do something to get under your skin. They may interrupt you in meetings, speak to you in a patronizing tone or make a snide remark.
When faced with disrespectful behavior, you may want to respond in a similar manner. However, this rarely leads to a positive outcome. It’s better to extend a little grace and patience, which goes a long way to defuse tension and keep the peace.
Michelle Jones, an operations manager at Duke University, says it’s possible to address a condescending colleague while keeping your cool. We share her tips in this issue of PromoPro Daily.
- Don’t take it personally. Even if the other person intended to be rude, try your best to stay calm and positive. Never underestimate the power of kindness in a negative situation, Jones says. Keep in mind that their words or actions probably have more to do with them than they do with you and what they think about you.
- Finish the interaction. You might want to react with condescension yourself, but try to avoid this. Jones recommends getting the information you need from the interaction and moving on.
- Seek clarification. If you feel like a co-worker is behaving in a condescending way, ask them what they mean by their actions or words. Some people are simply clueless, while others may be accustomed to speaking in a certain way and don’t recognize it as being inappropriate, Jones says.
- Watch your body language. You can hold your ground by standing up straight and taking up space. Don’t shrink back or slouch down. Jones recommends doing your best to maintain a calm and neutral demeanor.
- Choose your battles. Not every condescending remark requires a response. Distinguish between statements or actions that are irritating and behavior that is preventing you from getting your work done, Jones says.
- Keep it professional. You don’t have to put up with condescending co-workers, but always remain professional. Jones suggests calmly letting the other person know how their words or behavior impacted you.
If you find yourself wondering how to handle a condescending co-worker, remember to stay calm. This reflects your professionalism and helps contribute to a harmonious and productive workplace.
Compiled by Audrey Sellers
Source: Michelle Jones is an operations manager at Duke University and contributes posts for the Duke Learning and Organization Development blog.
